January 15th, 2014

Supernatural tonight. @ 10:29 pm

I don't know if anyone else is still watching Supernatural (and if you hate it because of skeevy race and gender issues, I get it -- they have them aplenty) but tonight's episode made me:

Read more...Collapse )

agh! apologies for the bat cut tag!!!

ps: it was not really a bat cut tag. Batman does not let me use his computer at all any more.

This entry also posted to Dreamwidth,


January 9th, 2014

Thor/Marvel/Avengers reccs please! @ 08:29 am

Doot de doot doot de doot de doot doot

To anybody out there and all ships at sea -- does anybody here have any reccs for Thor/Marvel/Avengers fandom. I mean I've *found* it and have found lots of fic and some bery lovely tumblrs but I'm looking for reccs for your favourite meta, fic, art, and vids.

Thank you

This entry also posted to Dreamwidth,


February 4th, 2012

(no subject) @ 02:43 pm

Dear Livejournal,
Please do not delete my journal. And stop sending me notifications about other people's journals being deleted. It is distressing.


July 16th, 2011

storm tonight @ 10:36 pm

lightning and thunder and a shattering downpour for the last 15 minutes or so. It was the first time Dexter's ever noticed thunder, but it was pretty houseshaking. You could see he wasn't sure whether to panic or not so we distracted him with an ice pop and some biscuits. The biggest, closest flash/crash persuaded him that he'd be happier under my desk where he is now, back to not noticing the diminishing thunder as the storm moves away. Brave boy! Gold Star!


July 12th, 2011

Do not think that you know! @ 10:57 am

As of Sunday I am an official dog walker at the Coquitlam Animal Shelter. However, there is only one "green" dog available and she is getting walked to within an inch of her life. Green dogs are the onces who are small, have decent leash manners and no aggression issues. The next level up are Blue dogs -- bigger, stronger, less well mannered dogs who may have aggression and;or fear issues with people or dogs, but have not actually bitten anyone. This is the level I would like to be walking, but you have to show a good deal of commitment before they give you a Blue dog trial. I would like to start walking right away, but of course I will have to take time off whenever the surgery is rescheduled to.

Have I mentioned here that my eye surgery was postponed for at least a month? My surgeon got some horrible virus that put him in the hospital. He'll be on medical leave for at least 3 or 4 weeks. Probably, hopeuflly, they will reschedule for early or mid August. In the meantime I am back at work, altho most of my patients have now been farmed out to other therapists for the summer. Whatever. *g*

In other news, for no reason I can fathom I joined Nanowrimo this year. What will I write? you ask. No fucking idea, I will answer. Maybe S2 Sherlock will inspire me. Or I'll write something non-fannish -- a post apocalyptic Incredible Journey... Who knows? Anybody else doing it?

July 1st, 2011

the r word @ 02:44 pm

I have been very bad about using the R word and it's been hard for me to embrace that it is truly a slur, but this ad gave me shivers and I will be better about it:


June 26th, 2011

NEW FIC: "Debris" by The Spike, PG, @ 10:21 pm

Title: Debris
Author: The Spike (spike21)
Rating: PG
Warnings: non-sexual nudity, off-screen violence
Authors Note: for SarahT for comma-wrangling above, and beyond.

Summary: "What are you planning to do here… tidy the flat? A bit of hoovering, perhaps?" Missing scene from the beginning of TGG.

***Collapse )

February 15th, 2011

information no longer wants to be free @ 11:22 pm

This is the public post saying that I have made some cuts in my flist and am going to post friends locked only from now on. I will eventually move all my fic over to AO3 but it's stuck in procrastination hell right now, so if you want to read something old, let me know and I'll put it up at the archive for you. If you think you've been cut in error or feel a burning need to be my friendyou can email me via my LJ addy. That is all.

February 5th, 2011

sort of notes on what could have been an essay on asexual!sherlock... @ 04:39 pm

NOTE: This discussion has gotten more heated than I had anticipated. I didn't mean to make anyone feel patronized or put down, I have no negative opinions of asexuality or the asexual community and my questions were meant to elicit opinions on the subject, not to cause anyone pain. However, I'm not really able to monitor this discussion or add anything but my own experience so I'm freezing it here. Thank you to everyone who expressed an opinion -- it always takes courage to do so.

...if I still retained the will and the skill to engage in actual intellectual discourse.

I have found myself wondering why sherlock! fandom had chosen the term 'asexual' to describe a particular iteration of Sherlock over the terms 'celibate' or 'abstinent'?

My guess is that it has something to do with the idea that a biological imperative (whether anatomical, physiological, or pscychophysiological) is more likely to be seen as... I don't know... valid(?)... than conscious choice by society at large -- or at least less likely to be challenged, denied or doubted, but I'm not at all sure that's the whole of it.

I think why it rings so discordantly to me is that asexual!sherlock as actually portrayed in many (not all!) of the stories I've read in the subgenre doesn't seem so much physically incapable of sexuality, as the use of 'asexual' as defined in, say, MW would imply, but more disinterested in and detached emotionally from the desire for sex. My feeling is that I would have defined all these Sherlocks as abstinent and passively so.

There is something of a disconnect with canon origins of 'asexual' sherlock as well. I *think* the origin of the iteration is Sherlock saying that he is married to his work, that girlfriends are 'not exactly my area' and his seeming obliviousness around John's dating life. It's possible that the creators have more specifically addressed the idea or even used the term 'asexual' in interviews to describe sherlock. I'll leave that alone for the moment. I would more likely call canon!sherlock abstinent. That implies to me that while he could engage in sexual behaviour, he simply doesn't. As such he falls outside, not so much 'normal behaviour' as defined by society, but 'idealized normal behaviour' as seen on TV. (The ideal being that the fictional male hero is highly sexual.) I wonder if the whole christian right wing 'abstience' as a moral virtue association has tainted the term. And if cathoiic priests' association with pedophilia has similarly tainted the term 'celibate'.

That many of these stories are explicitly erotic is also interesting. It sort of takes the asexual person out of sexual isolation, so less marginalization maybe? Less a stigma of inadequacy or abnormality (thus something seen as requiring 'fixing' by society in general.)

Sexuality is so complicated. Even just looking up the terms and implications of all the kinds of asexuality, nonsexuality, intersexuality, even just trying to dissect the elements that make up a shared concept of sexuality (genitalia, sexual identity, hormonal imperative, conceptualization of desire) for this discussion feels like an unsuspecting step onto quicksand. (Not to mention the irony that there is very little point in including 'procreation' as an element in the discussion.)

Anyway, asexual!sherlock as a symbolic trope in sherlock fiction (or something like that.) Discuss!

NB: I have recently encountered ace!sherlock. Just... no. Ace!sherlock flies a Sopwith Snipe and requests kippers for breakfast. You have been warned


quota reached @ 04:59 am

Here are the things we are maxed out on for February:

medical stupidity
animal cruelty
family drama
self-righteous twattery

No more submissions in these life areas will be accepted. Thank you all for playing.

February 2nd, 2011

Thank god.. @ 03:57 am

... for tea
... for days off
... for the internet
... for fandom

Sometimes I'm really grateful for the speedy passage of days. Look! The week has just begun and it's my weekend already. Of course it does help that my weekend is Wednesday/Thursday. I suppose it confuses things further to say that my week starts Friday and ends Tuesday.

... for sleepy puppies who come wandering out to see why you're not in bed at 3 am.

It's been a bit of a long week (for my particular values of 'week') all the same and an irksome one in some ways. One way is in the lack of new episodes of the few shows I actually watch like Big Bang Theory, Supernatural (extra grr!), House and The Mentalist. I've been really tired too -- I've lost so much time to napping this week, but man, when the tired hits my eyes just slide closed and I end up with a long string of ddddddddddddddds on my screen. And since I was tired and vulnerable, the bat signal went off back east and I got a lovely phone call full of family drama. Also, it has been ages since I had face-time with faith0322. Also some local news of animal cruelty was quite upsetting and discouraging..

Work's been good all week though, and the weather cleared up considerably on Saturday and has been more or less nice since. Some health issues seem to have resolved themselves, finally and let's see, Dexter's on leash behaviour continues to improve, I'm nearly finished a story I'm working on and have ideas for 2 others and oh yes, I have tea.

Mmmm. Tea!


January 30th, 2011

The weekend of mine @ 11:15 pm

Saturday I worked from 8 until 2 without a break (90min, 60min, 45min, 60min, 75min) came home, ate a tuna sandwich and a half another tuna sandwich, fell into a coma for 2 hours and then went out to our clinic staff Christmas dinner, which we always have in January.

We ate at the Mongolie Grill in Langley and it was... okay. I like the people I work with a lot but I don't have a bunch in common with them, so while it was fun, I was glad to get home. Stayed up and wrote a bit, watched some Benedict Cumberbatch and went to bed at a (mostly) reasonable hour.

Got up early this morning and lo and behold, that giant yellow ball of fire was back. The three of us (Mr. S, Dexter and I) went for a lovely DRY walk in the park. There were a ton of dogs on the baseball diamond but they were mostly Sunday dogs so I didn't know many of them well.

Dexter was happy enough though. After the park we went to Costco and bought dogfood and bagels and various necessities. Came home and fell into another coma-like sleep on the sofa (woke up with the dog curled up behind my legs (common) and his snout tucked between my thighs (Snouts! Snouts in new places!). Well below the "denger zone" I should add but nonetheless DISCONCERTING!!!

Got up and took him for a short walk, tidied the kitchen, took out the garbage and recycling, did some laundry, watched a bit of a show featuring Charlie Brooker called "TV ruined your life" and then surfed the internets for a bit and chatted with Mz. harriet_spy. Then I wrote some more. Ate dinner. Watched a bit of Roger Waters and Dave Gilmour totally bring it with "Wish You Were Here" and "Comfortably Numb", and then fiddled a bit with the writing

Might do a bit more before bed, but I might not. Tired now, despite comas.

This post brought to you by "Trying To Post Occasionally" -- a human communication endeavour.

January 27th, 2011

what I need... @ 12:20 pm

... is a special christmas crossover episode of American Pickers/Hoarders.


January 1st, 2011

Yuletide reveal @ 06:54 am

Chapter XIII: The Court Returns A Verdict
fandom: Alice in Wonderland - Lewis Carrol

I was very happy with my assignment for Yuletide this year. Alice In Wonderland is one of the childhood stories that wove its way into interior landscape and it was delightful to think about what would go on in Wonderland after Alice left. I'd originally outlined a whole novel that would have the White Rabbit, the March Hare, the Gryphon and the Mad Hatter run backwards along the route of Alice's adventures in order to follow her back to where she came from. For the last scene I imagined them, Tenniel drawings come to life, climbing out of the rabbit hole, slipping past Alice's dreaming sister and heading off to have their own adventures in the real world. However, the deadline caught up with me and I had to settle for a bit of closure for the Trial. That said, it was very fun to write and I'm glad my recipient was happy with it.

This entry orginally posted to Dreamwidth, comment here or there as it pleases you.


December 27th, 2010

Yuletide @ 04:37 am

The story written for me is perfect. It's a The Mentalist story, set in a Steampunk fantasy AU which is the best idea anyone has had in the fandom EVER.

I can't say too much about the specifics of my love for this fic, but above all it captures everything I would want in a The Mentalist fic -- the banter, the sweetness, the utter charm and weirdness of Jane, the oddball practicality of the team and the underlying darkness and tragedy on which it all rides PLUS an awesome new world (Steampunk!!! Fantasy!!!) that fits all of the above with surprising perfection.

Go! Read!

What You See Is What You Get (If You're Looking Hard Enough) by Anonymous (until Jan 1)

This entry orginally posted to Dreamwidth, comment here or there as it pleases you.


December 23rd, 2010

Sherlock!BBC @ 10:04 pm

Current Mood: prodrome-y

okay, yes, I am sucked in. I blame SarahT even though I found the source first, I was just fine not being fannish about it.

So now I'm rewatching The Great Game and oh my god, how did I miss this tiny, perfect exchange:

cut because it's technically a spoilerCollapse )

This entry orginally posted to Dreamwidth, comment here or there as it pleases you.

December 22nd, 2010

the power of polite expressions of disappointment @ 02:57 pm


Our 1997 Intrepid has been sitting in our driveway since it stopped running las summer. We were offered $100 as a trade in on our new car (probably out of politeness since it was in that phase of car life where the car runs great and then it doesn't run at all and every repair is more expensive than the car is worth). Among the fairly recent repairs were a 2 year old transmission and 2 brand new tires, but neither I nor Mr. Spike really had the time or energy to devote to selling it or burying it or whatever, so it has been sitting in the driveway being annoying and sad for months. Ultimately we decided to call the Kidney Car program and get them to take it away. I think the Kidney Car Program (and others like it) are an awesome idea. You get a free tow, a tax receipt and a warm feeling in your heart and no dead car carcass in front of your house. Mr. Spike was resistant -- not because he is uncharitable -- but because I think he sekritly loved that car and still thought it could rise again.

Eventually he agreed, though, on one condition -- he could keep the new tires. Faith0322 had donated her old car to The Kdney Car program and said that she'd had no problem getting her tires back, so I made the arrangements. They were to come and pick up the car on Monday at 8 am and they would keep the tires for 3 days and we could come and get them.

Of course you know it didn't happen like that.

-on the friday before, A. from the Kidney Car Program called to ask if it was okay if the drivers came in the afternoon between 1 and 3. No problem.

-Monday at 2:30 A. called to say their truck had broken down, could they come Tuesday. Hmm, says I. We actually got the car to run long enough to climb our incredibly steep driveway so it's now on the street, where it could now potentially get a ticket for not having insurance. Let me see what I can work out, says A.

- A new tow truck and driver are dispatched for 4:30. He arrives at 4:20 while Mr. Spike is still at the grocery store which is only important because Mr. Spike has to sign the transfer papers. The new driver has no paperwork, but A. says she will send it to us when the car is processed in 6 to 8 weeks. Okay. Mr. Spike arrives in time to sign the papers, the driver is told that we want the tires set aside for us and says he'll put a sign in the car window to that effect.

-today Mr. Spike goes to pick up the tires. It's about an hour drive to the place (more like 90 minutes in rush hour traffic) and when he gets there the new tires are mysteriously missing. Sorry, says the Kidney Car Program All we can do is give you 2 other random tires. *cue Debbie Downer riff* As you can imagine, he was not best pleased by this. In fact he was pretty damn upset and I can't blame him. They had to get 2 things right. They had to pick up the car and they had to give us back the tires. They got a D on the first, a B- on the retry and a big fat F on the final.

So, I ate my ragea chocolate bar and called A.,and in my polite Canadian way I said, you know, A., I'm very disappointed in what happened with the tires.

Actually, says A, my boss found them (it looked like someone had scooped them and put them aside for later stealing) and if you want them we'll have them delivered to you. I said yes baby yes.

Now it's possible A. is blowing smoke, so I'm not telling Mr. Spike until they show up at the door with the tires in hand, but assuming she's not, I will tentatively recommend the Kidney Car Program for recycling your junker..

I'll keep you postedl

ETA: Sadly, she was blowing smoke. There are no tires to be found now. She says they will now be changing their policy and no longer guaranteeing that they will return your tires.

So I guess the power of polite disappointment is VERY LITTLE!!!

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December 19th, 2010

POLL!!! @ 04:36 am

Time wasting poll under cutCollapse )

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December 18th, 2010

DONE!! @ 03:48 pm

*runs around flailing*

Yuletide is betaed, revised and uploaded.

This entry orginally posted to Dreamwidth, comment here or there as it pleases you.


December 17th, 2010


er, Yuletide draft that is. Thank god. I can never write until the almost last minute, but at the same time I never really have any idea what the story is until I start writing. After yuletide reveal I think I will post my outline so we can all have a good laugh.

This entry orginally posted to Dreamwidth, comment here or there as it pleases you.


December 15th, 2010

Puppy!! @ 04:19 am

It's been a while since I posted, so I think I'll start off with some media from my favorite fandom: Dexter! (the one with the dog, not the serial killer.)

Dexter is now 17 months old, just over a year and a half. He continues to be the best and the prettiest and a VERY GOOD BOY!!

This year has been moderately eventful. Dexter got his first (and second) tick and got bit by another dog who crossed the line from rough play to aggression. (The bite was only skin deep, but big enough to require two staples.) Dexter is pretty resilient though, and even though he no longer plays with this dog, the two have settled into civility.* He also stopped going to adventure day care once a week.

It turned out that Dexter and the owner were locked in a battle of wills over dexter's behaviour in the van they used to transport the dogs to the adventure walk. The amount of wrong in the above sentence is pretty huge and I'm still upset over how things were handled. Basically, Dexter would freak out in the van. This is obviously not tolerable behaviour. There are many ways of handling this and I would have preferred a) a heads-up that Dexter needed to learn better van riding skills and couldn't participate until he had them, or b) pretty much anything besides them GETTING INTO A BATTLE OF WILLS WITH THE PUPPY!!! Anyway, I'm sure dexter missing his adventure walks as much as I miss having a day off from dog responsibilities, but for now we will muddle through on our own.

Currently Dextger is studying the arts of Not Pulling On The Leash and Not Barking At People While On The Leash. Dexter's offleash personality is nearly perfect -- he listens, he pays attention, he checks-in with me frequently. He is a mellow dog offleash, friendly with people and dogs but mostly content with a quick hello-sniff or a bit of chase or a stick. His usual response to another dog's aggression is to sidestep and walk on, altho if the dog is actually in his face he will stand his ground enough to not get picked on. Surpisingly (to me, anyway) he is much more responsive to the Leave It command when off-leash -- the exceptions being a large body of water (he's about 50/50 with that one) or a a patch of Something Awful to roll in (we shall not speak of StinkFails 1 through 6.).

On-leash has been a different story, however, as he has been getting more and more barky when walking or sitting on-leash. It's taken us a long time to understand what that was about but it turns out (as usual) that the problem is us. Changing *my* onleash behaviour has made all the difference in reducing Dexter's on-leash frustrations and anxieties and so *his* behaviour has improved dramatically.

Mostly though, Dexter just manages to make me laugh and laugh. (And when I laugh too hard he comes running to bring me toys and lick my face until I'm pretty much unconscious. He also does this when I'm coughing, choking or sneezing. On the other hand, if I fall down, I just become a convenient piece of sidewalk for him to trot over. He still goes mad for a good stick, for his ball, for biscuits and most especially being chased around the house.** He still lives for the morning walk to the park to play fetch and meet the other puppies. He still loves skritches and napping and smelling stuff. And did I mention food? He drools so much when we are eating that I always think of Kodos and Kang from the Simpsons. To Serve Man.

Anyway, enough talk. Here are the pictures:

under the cutCollapse )

This entry orginally posted to Dreamwidth, comment here or there as it pleases you.


November 18th, 2010

Dear Yuletide Writer @ 11:12 pm

First of all, I'm so very glad you are going to write in one of my requested fandoms. I hope the assignment will be as fun for you to write as it will be for me to read.

If you already have an idea, and know what you want to write, even if it's completely different from what I requested, I say go for it. Your story idea might make me even happier than mine would.

But if you want to tailor it more for me, then you are super-awesome and here are my personal quirks:
Read more...Collapse )

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November 15th, 2010

stuff/nonsense @ 03:33 am

First and foremost, thank you to everyone who wished me a happy birthday! I had a very happy birthday indeed. Cake was involved. *g* I am now just one card short of a full deck.


I am currently making a stab at cleaning and organizing my office. (Stab! Stab!). It's going along, slowly but surely, but it's not easy. I'm not a hoarder, but given the right (or wrong) circumstances, I could be. Right now what I have is a lot of paper that must be sorted, which is a challenge. For various reasons that don't need exploring at this juncture, cleaning and tidying don't fill me with satisfaction and happiness, they fill me with a horrible, chest-clawing anxiety. I do however have a secret weapon -- Faith0322!!! She is a virtuoso organizer and more importantly she is genuinely non-judgemental about it. I can't tell you how incredibly helpful it is to know that that support is available.

Anyway, the reason I am forging ahead on the office sorting, is that I finally got over one of my other issues and hired someone to replace all the upstairs windows!!! This is an expensive project that has needed doing for the last 20 years as these are the original windows from when the house was built in 1967. I'm pretty psyched about that. It's happening in like 2 weeks!!


Important question for the jews on my flist:
Our oven has a "sabbath" setting. How exactly does that work??

Other important question:
Anybody have a good simple recipe for prune bars, prune muffins, prune scones...? I just have this craving for a prune based baked good.


okay. back to bed. Have to get up in 2 hours to walk the dog.

This entry orginally posted to Dreamwidth, comment here or there as it pleases you.


November 7th, 2010

several cranky hours later... @ 07:44 am

So I went to visit, where I had not been for a long time and was just about blasted out of my chair by a loud full page video commercial that covered the whole front page. Jesus *fuck*! Does anyone seriously think that anyone is going to be pleased by something like that???? I was so startled I couldn't find the "close' tab, I had to use my back button to shut the damn thing off.

Now I want to punch the person responsible in the FACE.

This entry orginally posted to Dreamwidth, comment here or there as it pleases you.


oh I remember what I was going to ask @ 04:32 am

Does anybody out there play Hidden Object games?

My favourites in the last year have been:

Pure Hidden
Drawn: Dark Flight (collector's edition)
Lost in the City: Post Scriptum
Vault Cracker

basically games that are a little unusual, either in aesthetics or game play and do not involve going to exotic locations full of cultural inaccuracies and racist depictions of "natives". Anyone have reccomendations for games? I play on a Mac.

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random @ 03:53 am

the sleep centers in my brain have gone on strike or something. I'm just waking and sleeping purely at random now. Booyah!!!!

I predict there will be pancakes and bacon for breakfast this morning.

Mr. Spike is really into this new The Walking Dead series. Sadly, I do not share his love of zombies.

Criminal Minds is beginning to annoy me. Their serial killers are becoming more and more esoteric and bizarre. The last one was beyond silly. Next they'll have a guy who only kills random strangers wearing pink and using minty toothpicks on the subway on thursdays*. Personally? I think it's bizarre enough to, I don't know, KILL A BUNCH OF PEOPLE Really, you don't have to fancy that up so much. In fact, I'm kind of tired of the whole gruesome crime thing these days. Maybe they should do a special Rocky Horror episode like Glee did. Or do a retelling of The Philadelphia Story. Or really anything that would result in more of the cast bantering and kissing each other and taking each others shirts off.**

The Mentalist could also do more along those lines.


BTW, you know how I know when I have drifted off at the keyboard? A long row of ddddd's in my chat window. I wish it were zzzz's as that would be way funnier. (As faith0322 knows, I am also quite capable of having a phone conversation while asleep. It's not always obvious that I'm asleep, although one time I said randomly: "Are you pushing the shopping cart?" and then we were both -- whut? whut???) And it's not like I fall asleep while on the phone. I mean that I apparently will pick up a ringing phone while asleep and not actually wake up, even tho I think I am awake. Probably it's a brain tumour symptom.

And now I am sleepy again so I will quickly call my mom and crawl back into bed to awaid my pancakes and bacon.


*parse *that*, motherfuckers!!!
** this one too. Apparently the sleep centers are also in charge of subject/object identification.

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November 5th, 2010

*fist pump* @ 11:20 pm

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October 28th, 2010

(no subject) @ 07:36 am

The dog walker was great, and Dexter loved her and also the other dog she brought with her -- a very sweet Golden doodle, but Mr. D. is still frightened of driving with other people and had to be restrained in the car (he will pace and go from front to back and generally try to get OUT!). He was quite mopey when he came home and didn't cheer up until I took him for a walke to the park and some ball throwing. So I am having very mixed feelings and am not sure whether I'll go with it or not. I'll give it next week and see.

The window replacement guy gave us an expensive but reasonable estimate for the windows. The company is with BBB and they make and install the windows and take away the old windows for recycling. They do the job in one day. If we don't replace the sliding doors it's affordable, so I think I will go with it. *meep*

The headache and eyeache are finally gone, so I am feeling quite chipper this morning. Off to do the morning walk around the park shortly. Yay for no rain yet!

This entry orginally posted to Dreamwidth, comment here or there as it pleases you.


October 27th, 2010

(no subject) @ 08:20 am

Posting still appears to be an effort but I have some jittering time this morning. Two exciting things are happening at 9.

First, we are trying a dogwalker for Dexter to give me back my Wednesday morning off. She is actually one of my massage clients who has her own dogwalking business and we have spent much time talking about dogs and I really like her attitude toward animals. The plan is that she will take Dexter and no more than 3 other dogs who are compatible for a good walkabout in the wilderness for a couple of hours in the morning. Dexter seems to like her muchly and I think he will enjoy himself. Still, a mom worries!!!

The other thing that's happening is that a guy is coming to give me an estimate on relplacing all our upstairs windows. This is something that I've wanted to do for a long time as the windows we have are single pane wonders from the 1970s. I know this is going to be hugely expensive but hope that ultimately it will make the house more temperate and less energy consumptive. I just hope the guy is not super-judgy about my housekeeping.

Other than that, things are much the same. I am working. I have been to a few meditation classes. I have been walking the dog and doing stuff around the house, reading fic and watching tv.

My latest health fun things are spasm-y legs (yes I am hydrated, yes I have my K,Mg,Ca, yes I stretch) Probably it's coming from the calcific tendonitis in my hips and from being overweight and walking too much. I'm hoping the one day off from walking a week will help. I've also been having these endless headaches (or just the one endless headache -- I can't even tell. I don't know if it's a migraine or not. Sometimes I am queasy and light sensitive, but not always. My worry is that something bad is happening in my left eye (the cornea eye.) I have an appointment with the eye doctor coming up so I'll find out.) In the meantime, headache.

This entry orginally posted to Dreamwidth, comment here or there as it pleases you.

October 13th, 2010

cannot be textually rendered @ 10:29 pm

okay, I have been looking at dog halloween costumes.


This one has completely killed me tho. I honestly don't know whether to be pleased or offended.

This entry orginally posted to Dreamwidth, comment here or there as it pleases you.


(no subject) @ 06:55 am

Had an absolutely lovely dream about getting to ride a huge piebald horse. In the dream I had never ridden before but the horse and I had made a connection and it was an amazing feeling to sit on her broad, broad back. I felt... privileged.

This entry orginally posted to Dreamwidth, comment here or there as it pleases you.


October 6th, 2010

The Stress of Zen @ 09:05 pm

1. Tonight's meditation and talk was very stressful!!! I seem to get very het up by some of the core buddhist principles. Every statement makes a challenging question pop into my head -- what about *this* situation? What about if *that* happens? And than I want to ask, but I don't feel like asking will tell me what I actually want to know. I distrust simplicity and the dharma is nothing if not simple. Tonight's talk also turned to -- god, I hate this word -- "triggery" topics. Topics that already fill me with angst and anxiety. And when people were asking stupid questions and seemingly missing even the most basic point of the talk, I couldn't even hold back from blurting out something like "but aren't you confusing internal and external problems???" to this poor lady who was just trying to deal with her hoarding issues through buddhism.

I was anxious enough to actually want to leave before the last meditation, but I stuck it out. The last meditation was thankfully a short one, and it wasn't so much a meditation as a contemplation. We were to contemplate some situation in our lives where we had negative feelings about something and to try to get some perspective on that thing and try to find the corresponding inner cause of our distress. I decided to commit to the exercise despite my qualms and actually I think it turned out to be useful. I'll see how I feel about it when I'm away from the Kool-Aid. *g*

And I suppose at some point I will have to deal with what it is about thinking about buddhist principles that fills me with distress. But not tonight anyway

2. Cody! I'm still thinking about your comment about inner and outer sources for suffering and happiness -- I found that a very useful way to look at the problem, but of course I stil have thoughts and qualms and what-ifs. I actually wrote some of them down and when I have a bit more time I'd like to pick up that thread with you again.

3. The other thing I was thinking about (or really, 'getting worked up about') tonight, is how the religious aspects of buddhism instantly alienate me. Not to get deeply into my position on religion (I am basically a secular humanist) but despite that fact that the dharma *is* part of a religion, I hold out hope that it can also exist in a secular context. (a quick Google shows that if I want to follow up on that, there are writings about such a thing, so that's encouraging.)

Anyway, it wasn't a relaxing session the way last week was, but I feel I got a lot out of it.

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Domesticity @ 08:03 am

A day off!!!! Two, in fact. Thank god!

I think I shall have to have tattooed in neon green on my forehead: DO NOT WORK EXTRA HOURS OR YOU WILL DIE.

I think that is basically what happened last week. I don't know if I actually had the flu or if my body just said no mas but either way I am very glad to be back on my normal schedule.

Today that schedule will include a shower, a nap, a nice leisurely walk with Dexter and some fetch, paying some bills, perhaps a bit of tidying, then meditation class and making meatball subs for dinner (as Mr. Spike was kind enough to make a jeroboam of meatballs last night *g*)

My new pants came from L.L.Bean. I will probably have to exchange them for a size smaller -- not because I have lost weight but because in a moment of insecurity I ordered pants that I knew would likely be a bit big. I suppose I should also have tattooed on me: IF YOU MEASURE YOURSELF THAT IS WHAT SIZE PANTS YOU SHOULD ORDER! They are very nice though and I will look somewhat less like the hobo massage therapist in them. I'm kind of torn tho because exchanging them will mean another couple of weeks without decent pants. Maybe I will try to pick up something cheap but presentable in the meantime.

Speaking of Dexter... he seems to have healed up very nicely altho that "weird scab on his head" turned out to be a tick. May I say... YAG!!!! We took him to th enew vet and they very nicely took it out and let us know that our favorite park is apparently rife with them. Ah well. Glad he's vaccinated vs Lyme disease.

Mr. Spike continues to be one of the Working Ill. He is still coughing and mildly feverish. And tired. *pets him*.

And that's about it.

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(no subject) @ 07:43 am

I'm rescinding my ban on LJ comments. I don't even make locked posts any more, so really, I'm going to leave it up to you to comment where you feel most comfortable.

This entry orginally posted to Dreamwidth, comment here or there as it pleases you.


October 1st, 2010

I bore, I whinge @ 09:23 pm

It's been a rough week here at the Spike's. Mr. Spike is sicker than a dog.and actually has been for 2 weeks.

I've had a headache/migraine(?) since Tuesday and now I think I'm getting the same crud Mr. Spike has.

Worst of all, wee Dexter got bitten by another dog at the park. The dog is one he plays with all the time and it just sort of turned on him while they were wrestling. He ended up with two punctures in his shoulder and a cut on his head. The punctures required 2 staples and antibiotics. And he's not allowed to play offleash or with other dogs for 10 days. Also he has to wear a humiliating t-shirt so he can't scratch his staples.


Things of the good:
I did go to the meditation class and it was very enjoyable. It was, as advertised, a short breathing meditation to start, a talk about buddhist principles, a short break and then a longer meditation. The main subject that night was "attachment as a source of suffering" which I alway find complicated, but two ideas stuck with me.

One is that if we let go of the idea that we should be comfortable, then it becomes possible that we can find peace of mind even if we are in pain. This sees profound to me in the context of chronic pain, which I've often found very distracting and draining in my life. I can't say that I was able to "embrace the pain" as simply another state of being, but just the idea that the two states are not mutually exclusive is sort of exciting.

The other sort of related idea was that a possible reason for accepting pain and suffering was if it would benefit another. I'm not entirely at ease with this idea but at least I can understand it.

Also they had cookies.

Anyway, meditating in a structured situation worked well for me and I'm looking forward to doing it again.

Assuming I survive this lung, head and tummy crud. And the Restless Dog!

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September 25th, 2010

my immune system is like one of those planes that scoop up scuba divers in urban myths @ 12:23 am

So after all my panic -- all you have to say to me are "bedbugs" (thank you, beachlass and harriet_spy!!! And may I say GAHH!) and "fleas" and at 10 o'clock at night I WILL wash all my bedding in hot water and bleach -- the horrible bite is pretty much healed up. Last night I put a bandaid on it with some polysporin and tonight when I looked at it it was basically just a healed over scab. Sometimes a crazed immune system is a beautiful thing. Although, who knows. It could have been just some weird reaction to a mosquito bite in the first place. WhatEVAH, body. What. Evah.

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September 23rd, 2010

WHAT BIT ME???? @ 04:16 pm

I have been acquiring mosquito bites in little clusters in various awkward location, so at first I thought this was another mosquito bite. I got it yesterday some time and noticed it last night around 9 pm. IT IS GROSS AND ALARMING!!!!

pictures under the cuts, not for the faint of heart

This is what it looked like last night.Collapse )

This is what it looks like nowCollapse )

I was going to go to the doctor today but did not. I have put plysporin on it and a hot salt compress. It doesn't hurt but it's itchy, swollen and hot to the touch. Definitely infected. I *will* go to the doctor tomorrow if it's not better, but does anybody recognize the kind of bit it is?

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September 16th, 2010

the writing process, such as it is. @ 09:58 pm


I'm not a disciplined writer at all. I consider myself a slightly lazy dilettante who waits for inspiration to visit and hates the slog -- unless I get a bee in my writing bonnet.. Today, while walking the dog, I encountered such a bee. This sentence (or parts of it -- images, turns of phrase, rhythm, words to this effect) appeared in my brain as I walked along.

... the slow but steady rain of yellow aspen leaves along the sun-striped path, like giant dust motes or the tumble of gold coins through clear green water.

I like it, but as it exists in isolation, I think it should really be a haiku:

slow tumble of gold
dropped coins in clear green water
falling aspen leaves

I'm much less sure of the quality of the haiku, however and for some reason I care.

Please comment -- whether you are haiku savvy or not. Does it work? Does it convey an emotion? Would you have picked different images or words for it? Should I just leave it as a random sentence?


And on an entirely unrelated and somewhat random note, since when has Rick James' Superfreak been considered appropriate background music for grocery shopping??? I was shocked to hear it in Thrifty's last night. SHOCKED, I tell you. SHOCKED!!! Also I might have had to dance just a little.

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September 13th, 2010

and curse sir walter raleigh, he was such a stupid git... @ 11:12 pm

Lordy but I am tired.

Dexter and I are back to walking up to, around and back from the park on our own. We're usually out for about 2.5 hours during which dexter gets to frolic and gambol and poop and I get to hang out with lots of dogs and dog people. It's both awesome and tiring. I think I'm walking about 6k a day.

Also, I'm working a few extra shifts in September. So I have less time off to recover between work days. Partly it's physical recovery, but mostly it's just that I need alone time to recharge. Massage therapy is people intense. I'll make up for it by taking time off in October and November.

I'm looking forward to two things in September. One is the premieres of most of my shows next week and the other is a buddhist meditation class I'm going to try. I've meditated before (Zen Mind; Beginner's Mind is the book I use), but only on my own and I would like to see what it's like in a structured situation with a guide.

Anyway, no real purpose to this post other than to not forget and stop posting.

Bedtime now.

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September 12th, 2010

(no subject) @ 10:00 am

I am tired and therefore am in a pissy and cranktastic mood. All I want to do is go back to bed but I have things to do like shopping and walkng der poochums and money wrangling of various kinds. For my reward, should I actually accomplish any of these things I would like to watch some enjoyable tv. Is anything good premiering tonight?

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September 7th, 2010

(no subject) @ 12:19 pm

Tags: ,

Had a great morning walk this morning. Left the house about 10 to 8 and apparently now it only takes about 25 minutes for us to walk up the hill. Another walk that used to take at least 30 minutes now takes fifteen. Which is to say we got to the baseball diamond around 8:30, which is too early to meet up with other dogs.

Dexter and I played fetch for about 20 minutes and then Rambo (border collie/lab/shepherd cross -- all black with white blaze and front sox) showed up with his person, a very nice woman whose name I am ashamed to say I have forgotten. She urged us to walk with her and Rambo, so we did, all the way back around teh Perimeter trail to where it is shut down and then back along the same trail. There we met up with Kelly who comes to the park with Brodie (English lab, black, about 90 lbs), Kya (Ridgeback, probably 80 lbs) and Jake (wee 9 lb mop dog, very loveable). The whole troupe of us headed back along perimeter, past the diamond where we parted company. It was very fun and social and the dogs get along well.

I then walked Dexter over to Starbucks where I had coffee and we shared a scone. All in all, Dexter got lots of trail walking, plenty of wrestling with Rambo, some fetch, a couple of dips in the pond, some pack play and some food.

Total walking: about 6 or 7 km I figure

Now that I'm home I am procrastinating on housework and bill-paying. I have a little extra time because my first patient cancelled so I don't have to leave for work until 3. Still... should get a move on.

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September 3rd, 2010

Puppy uppers @ 12:34 am

Dexter now weighs... 70 lbs!!!! I am unreasonably proud of that -- sort of like I'm growing a prize pumpkin. He put on am amazing 6 lbs of solid muscle since the beginning of the summer. You can see the change mostly in the way his chest and shoulders have filled out. Also in the dislocation of my arm when he gets a ping on his Squirrel Detector.

He was at the vet to get his vaccinations updated and to get his "anals expressed". I asked the vet if this was totally necessary as he seems to express them himself without a problem and shows no sign of scooting around on his bum or attempting to lick it or anything. She said as long as we kept an eye on things and brought him in right away if there was any sign of a problem it would probably be okay.

This is the new vet, btw -- as the old vet has semi-retired. I liked him quite a big, but I think I may like the new one even more. She was very gentle and patient with Dexter. He's pretty cooperative, but he doesn't particularly like getting his orifices checked. If one gets bossy about this and tries to force him, he will squirm and wriggle quite effectively out of your reach, but if you are gentle and patient he will allow you a peek and a poke and she seemed to get this. Anyway, I liked her manner and her thoroughness and flexibility and it didn't hurt that she said Dexter was a lovely dog with very nice teeth and a great looking coat and healthy ears who was the perfect weight for his size and in great shape. *g*

And you can blame Mr. Spike for this, as he put up the the first version and told me to play around with it, but, erm, god help me Dexter has a blog and website. ::shame::

It's Dexter Dog's House . I am sort of orienting it toward kids and those of us whom dogs turn to mush, but I'd love to get comments on my pretty boy's site.

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September 2nd, 2010

snark hunt @ 12:52 am

I have put up a fic at AO3!!!

It's an old fic, ( Fealty , a short VM ficlet featuring Logan Echolls ca 2005, which planetalyx asked me about, setting in motion this whole "gather ye your fics while ye may" thing. Since I'm insanely neurotic about certain aspects of my fic life, this is a bigger accomplishment than you might think. I am quite stoked about it. Now I just have to sort of locate the rest of them...

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September 1st, 2010

Are these the droids I'm looking for? @ 12:50 pm

LJ has confused and befuddled me for the last time. I don't want my LJ stuff to show up on Facebook or Twitter or on E-bay under "miscellaneous crap my dog barfed up, starting bid $5". Nor do I want naked pictures of my nasty backstabbing comments posted to the televisions sets of the nation. Nor do I want Russian Mafia prostitutes arriving at my doorstep. I am not Greasemonkey savvy!!!! To paraphrase Sheldrake: "I DO NOT WANT YOUR DEAD, MANGLED RAT, THANK YOU SWEETIE!!!"

So, I have moved to Dreamwidth, bought land, put up the frame of a house. Soon I will invite dancing hillbillies and the Amish to help me raze the barn. ( I don't like barns, they attract the deadly cow and the terrifying sheep to build their nests.)

In honour of the occasion, I have changed the title of my "Reading Page" to reflect my true feelings.

Oh, no, your majesty. That was one of Wilde's.

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August 28th, 2010

(no subject) @ 03:56 pm

There is nothing like the cheery thump-thump-thump of a pile driver to bolt you into wakefulness at 4:30 in the morning. Sadly perfectly legal when it is building the new Port Mann bridge. And they'll be doing it until 2014, I hear. What fun!

I was also delighted to discover that tickets to see Cesar Milan live are $100.75. Tickets in the nosebleed seats and I'm not even joking about that as the Red Rock theatre is incredibly steep I'm not sure I can bring myself to spend that kind of money on an essentially passive event. (Now if it was salsa dancing with Cesar Milan... I'm just sayin'!)

On the other hand, Margaret Cho live tonight!!!! She will make it all better with the funny.


August 22nd, 2010

Lost finale, young people's music @ 12:36 am

Tags: ,

These are actually two separate subjects.

for reasons that don't need exploring at this juncture, we *just* saw the Lost finale which by some miracle neither of us had been spoiled for. No spoilers here, as I am still pondering the end and how I feel about it but I sure did cry like a bitch.

The other thing is, one of my fellow RMTs burned a new CD and I really like it but I didn't get a chance to ask her what it was and I'm hoping someone will recognize it from my vague description.

It's a female vocalist, vocal stylings, musci and lyrics reminiscent of Regina Spektor (I suppose it could even be her except that I don't see any matching lyrics on her albums. There is some electric guitar in some of the songs and one in particular sounds very blues-y. I remember (probably innaccureately) tiny snippets of lyrics from three songs.

1) tears on my (your?) pillow/oh you weeping willow/ how will you ever learn to love again
2) I am the butterfly (repeated many times in a sort of atonal chorus.)
3) One song was basically "I'm a _____; you're a ______" and the comparisons are very nerdy things including "You're a difficult equation, reater than x, lesser than y"

That's about it. Any help would be appreciated. Thanks.

August 21st, 2010

Updates @ 07:23 pm

Thank you to everyone who commented with suggestions on my last couple of posts. Things have improved on both fronts:

1. Spasm-y Leg Situation -- oh my god it *was* the bananas. I bought a bunch and have gone back to my 2 banana a day habit and the legs are less sproingy. The left one is still sore around the place where I have tendinitis, but I *think* the majority of the quad spasm is gone.

2. Stinky Dog Situation - Actually the handmade dog soap seems to have worked after all. Now that he is completely dry he actually smells quite lovely. The dead carcass was not skunk btw, it was something small, probably the remnants of a coyote's lunch.

Good work all around, internets!


August 20th, 2010

(no subject) @ 11:48 am


Okay, give. How do you get the smell of rotting animal carcass out of a dog's fur. Someone (who shall remain nameless, but is pictured under the cut in all his filthy, reeking glory, found a dead animal to roll about on. We have washed him with a special stink removing soap which, as you can imagine, did not remove all the stink. It's better -- he's tolerable from about a foot away if not directly downwind, but puppy kisses and snuggling remain problematic.

I am a such a good dogCollapse )

August 18th, 2010

this is my symphony @ 11:09 pm

in general I can't complain too much about my health. For instance, I don't have to get any organs removed this week. Nor do I need to get needles in my foot. Still I like to keep my hand in.

My current bizarre symptom is tonic muscle spasms. I most often get them in my left lateral quad muscle. Sometimes I'll also get them in my left lateral hamstring and my right forearm extensors. When it happens you can see that the muscle is absolutely rigid, like it's being clenched. Only I'm not clenching it, it's just all spasmed up. It's very achey and annoying, sort of a constant low grade pain and discomfort.

And man I am tired of hurty parts. Is there anyone out there over the age of fifty who does NOT have achey parts, and if so, how do you do that????


August 15th, 2010